they'll only be there til you're dead, so DREAM.

“Go CONFIDENTLY in the direction of your dreams! 

Live the life you’ve imagined” –Thoreau

Every morning when I sat up in my bed in my old apartment, the wall facing me held a canvas with the above quote. Naturally, I got use to its presence, so it didn't always serve the purpose of encouraging me to follow my dreams and do what I want to do, taking whatever steps I needed to get there. That's not easy to do. 
I've taken on a deep adoration for Fleetwood Mac's line,

 "Have you any dreams you'd like to sell?"
 I do. I have A LOT of dreams I'd like to sell. 
It surely would make things easier. 

Walking through the streets two weeks ago, I stumbled upon a group of musicians who were passionately playing this awesome music. These men were smiling, so incredibly happy to be doing what they loved. I stood and watched in awe as i let these thoughts settle over me. They had a HUGE crowd gathered around to watch and listen. People from the surrounding streets were  eager to join these talented individuals sharing their passion with others. there was this magnetic energy surrounding these guys and it was thrilling to watch. After several minutes, I walked away and continued onto my intended destination. Astoundingly, when I walked by five hours later, these guys were still at it. There was still a sizable circle around them, eyes glued with smiles painted on their faces. A few kids were even dancing along. I firmly believe that even if there hadn't been almost 100 people standing there, this group would have still been playing proudly with just as much energy. What a statement! 

Street musicians are generally looked down on, ignored, seen as a nuissance or whatever. There are huge misconceptions about poverty across the world. But I have a new-found appreciation for these musicians and the artists you see. Who knows, maybe they could be a lawyer or doctor but choose to do this because it's what their passionate about. More power to them. Since I can't sell my dreams or manage to forget about them, I will take a lesson from these guys and trust that if I do something I love, I will be happy. I will draw others to me as well. Everything else will fall in line after that.

A few days ago, I encountered a woman who pointedly questioned my intelligence, my background, my family and in the process insulted me more deeply than I have ever been insulted before. She boldly argued that I had no dreams and that if I did have dreams, I would be walking toward them on a straight and narrow path. I beg to differ. I do not think that the path is straight. Well, at least not any interesting path. I think my path has curves, bridges, waterfalls, concrete, yellow bricks and will lead me all kinds of adventures. Dreams are like the road signs that guide you and get you to wherever you want to be  headed. Luckily for this woman, I started thinking about the dreams that I have had throughout my life. When I was a little girl, I wanted to be a veterinarian. Or more specifically, one day my six year-old self  told my mother, "a dancing pig doctor." As a kid, I would play teacher for hours on end by myself upstairs. True. Thanks for almost 11 years of dancing, choreographing, directing plays, stage managing and acting, I would do anything to be on Broadway. Ever since my first trip to Paris, I've wanted to travel the world. Every summer day for several years, I watched ER at 10 am and 11 am which made me want to be an ER surgeon like George Clooney. With my mission trips and commitment to the refugees in Vienna, Austria, it is a deeply rooted dream of mine to support that mission monthly from my own paycheck. Languages captivate me. I dream of being bilingual and raising my children bilingual. 

In the scene between the window frame 
Where the jackals preyed on every soul
Where they tied you to a pole 
And stripped you of your clothes
I was a dreamer, staring at windows
Out onto the main street cause that's where the dream goes
And each time they found fresh meat to chew
I would turn away and return to you
You would offer me your unmade bed
Feed me till I'm fed, read me till I'm read
But when the morning came
You would catch me at the window again...
And when I got older, when I grew bolder
Out onto the streets I flew
Released from your shackles
I danced with the jackals
And learned a new way to move
So before you take this song as truthYou should wonder what I'm taking from you, how I benefit from you being here
Lending me your ears while I'm selling you my fears...

-Becoming A Jackel, Villagers

I realize that my dreams have changed a lot if I think about the different ones that I have had over my lifetime, but I have not forgotten them. "Don't lose the dreams inside your head, they'll only be there til your dead. So dream, little darling, DREAM." (Dave Matthews) I have gone from thinking about them in almost a fantasizing manner [staring out of windows onto the street where the dreams go] to actually realizing them- BECOMING these dreams [out onto the street i flew, released from your shackels, i danced with the jackals], one step at a time.  

I cannot forget them, I cannot sell them, so I must ensure that I am actively, passionately and CONFIDENTLY chasing my dreams. I will ensure that I am supporting my friends and encouraging them to do the same. Let's stop staring out of the window and join in!