uh, Dr I'm going to need a stronger painkiller. i wouldn't quite say this lortab is working.

MEDIOCRE is becoming a new favorite word.

i need more time staying at my apt. at least being here is less eventful.

i am thinking i may be on the borderline of a new phase before the "next" phase i was expecting in May. not certain about this, but i am excited, anxious, and open minded. 

so for all the drama, confusion, uncertainty and chaos of right now... i will let the fear in for five seconds then let it be gone. i will not run for the door. i have been an expert in both. but this time, i might like Kate say, "of course i will." after all, i'm not running now.

now if I can just find Jack Shephard to lead the herd in a chant of "live together, die alone."

watch the whole thing, but the good part is at the end.

fear is an odd thing.